A post from Girlythoughts on the topic of rape to continue our theme from down below, but also to talk about another;
… the coupling of anger or power with sexuality looks to me like a symptom of our culture’s, and most cultures’, messed up characterization of what it means to be masculine. When sex is described as nailing, screwing, hitting, banging, scoring, conquering, something is fucked up. When men can’t express emotions in front of other men like love and sadness without being ridiculed or having to make up for it with anger or drunkenness, [or getting high] something is fucked up. And we wonder why we have a rape problem. “Oh, it’s probably because of the way girls dress.” Yeah. I bet. (FYI: sometimes women who cover from head to toe get raped.)”
This is why feminism is not really, in my opinion, only about women’s liberation. Truly, I think the aim is to free everyone from societal constructs in which “men” behave one way and “women” behave another way. (And “queers” behave in X way, and “blacks” behave in Y, and … ad infinitum for however many categories we can put human beings into.)
These categories and sets of behaviour that are attributed to one group or another are deliberately divisive, and (more importantly) innaccurate, and don’t allow for the full potential range of human expression. How much innovation, art, literature and more has been lost to humanity because people were forced into little boxes that didn’t accurately reflect who they were?
In addition, notice that the qualities attributed to maleness tend to be the opposite of the qualities attributed to femaleness. This dynamic doesn’t reflect the reality of the world and it suggests rigidly immutable realities.
This harms all people, not just women.
(Well, I”m also making a wild leap and assuming that you believe women are people, but we’ll go with that for now. 
I love where you took that!
What a good post! I’m not sure that “male” language is as important as you think, because most of us (men) don’t think like that even if we use (or accept) the words sometimes.
For instance, when I hear the expression “banging” I don’t think of a HIM banging a HER, I think of a couple “banging” each other or rather together – i.e. copulating, having sex or whatever you wish to call it.
I think (from what researchers and others have told me and what I’ve read) that MOST of the time (though not all, obviously) rape is not really about sex at all, but about subjugation, power and and defiling the victim and that’s largely because of dreadful failings within our societies as a whole.
So I’m sure you’re perfectly right when you say it’s not a “women’s” problem – it’s a society problem and that ignorant, bigoted attitude extends WAY beyond the question of rape.